New Year. New Me. New Attitude. New Goals.

I am back. I feel so disappointed in myself for letting myself get to this point in my life. To the point of weighing and hurting so much. I hate looking at myself and hate being the fat one. I need to get off my arse and get moving.
 I am FAT, Overweight, OBESE. (ouch these words hurt.)
 I hate that I can't walk to my car after work and talk on the phone without getting winded. Grr.. Damn it I am only 40 and there are 90 year old healthier than me.
 Now that I have admitted this to myself I feel that I can get on. I am only going to go down from here. Down to a smaller size. I plan on writing here daily (but know that maybe only twice weekly I will get here but I will try) of the trials and tribulations of my weight loss journey. I know it wont be pretty. I know it wont be nice but Damn it I am going to do it.. I am going to get myself down to my goal weight.

 Starting Tomorrow. (only because today I am on pain killers for a tooth that was extracted last week and has caused so much pain to my jaw.)
 My plan for tomorrow is:
 Meet with the Missionaries and my friend KF.
 Devotional- Finish 1Nephi 19 and 20. Finish up with Lesson 2 Plan of Salvation.
 Housework
 Monkey to USPS to pick up package
Dinner
 Work out with Hubby using our Beach Body workout DVD's (he has P90X BUT I can't do that.......YET!)

I have changed my eating goals again. I am planning on a mostly vegetarian diet. I may add the occasional red meat and often some type of seafood. But mostly vegetarian (I had cucumber sandwich yesterday- OMGosh JUMMY (as we say instead of yummy!) Right now I have some red beans slow cooking in vegetable broth in my crockpot. These will be broken up and vacuum sealed into smaller portions (approx. 1.5 C) some will be used right away. I recently purchased a new Vegan Slow Cooker cookbook that I just can't wait to use.

 So about my tooth. I had broken a tooth last year sometime (mid year) and put off going to the dentist. Finally the pain became too much and I figured the amount of Orajel going into my system had to be bad.. I broke down and went to the Dentist... BUT not for the broken tooth. That one still does not bother me. I went to the Dentist Jan 6th only to be told that I had a major infection in my mouth (WHAT!!) and that I needed to be on an antibiotic for at least 24 hours. Not a happy camper was I. So back on the 7th. Had the tooth pulled AND a bone graft done. Good thing that came from this is that since then I have had no desire to drink beer.. That must have been my beer tooth! lol I did drink some one night. Two nights ago I was able to finish one. Last night I could barely drink the one I had. So no beer... Never thought I would say that. Can't guarantee how long that will be the case but no beer now (this will help with the plan of weight loss too!) I think I over did it and started eating solid foods to quick but after 4 days of mac and cheese, mashed potatoes and pudding I had to have real food... Well... Not good. Two days ago at work I was eating a chicken salad wrap (safe right? pretty soft stuff- my thought process) and BAM! HUGE BUTT bone poked me in the gums. Of course it could have only poked one place and that was all it took. I have been in terrible pain since. Son of a motherless biscuit eating goat it HURTS!! So now it is back to soft foods for a few days. But I found that a baked potato and chili (thankfully Wendy's chili has such little pieces in it I am able to mostly swallow instead of chew)fill me up. A large chili will last me two "feedings" (lol)


 Hope everyone has a wonderful blessing filled today. "To God Be The Glory Great Things He Has Done!"



JMFK 11/27/2010 Gone but never forgotten